4:54 p.m. - 2005-12-27
Goodbye D
Dear D,
I know that we haven’t spoken in a long time but I think about you everyday. Even though the only way that you will truly be at peace is if I let you go, I haven’t been able to. I have written you letters, prayed to God to seek your forgiveness, and I hope that I have gained some of that over the years. I wrote this to let you and the world know that I am truly sorry and I hope that you have forgiven me.
We were joined at a time of confusion in my life. At a time where I had everything but nothing, had everyone but no one. That’s when you came in to my life I was angry and disillusioned to what my life meant. I had done so many things to belittle my existence until you.
You woke up a desire that I never thought I had. You made me look at the future with bright eyes. You showed me the possibility of a future.. You made me realize that life was hard, and it hurts but there is light at the end of the rainbow. You stirred life into a bitter body and mind. You softened me to seek understanding and then be understood. I owe you so much yet, I have given you so little.
When I received my bachelor’s degree last year I cried and screamed “We did it!” because you were my motivation through it all. To provide myself a future is why we are no longer together, and I accomplished what I set out to do for you and me. You have been there and comforted me all of these years, but I need to move on.
I need to let you go and be at peace. Those that were suppose to re-introduce us into a new relationship, have lost hope. I never did loose hope or faith in you. I just wish I could have known you more. I know that you will never rest until I do so, today as much as it hurts – I release you to GOD. Be his angel as you have always been mine. I loved you from the moment we met, and part of me died when you left me. I know that you are been cared for but I want you to know I will always love you.
If you ever need me, my dreams are always free to you.
Love Always and Forever,
M
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